(reprinted from The Huffington Post)
Letting go is not so easy to do. When we have made a heart connection with someone it can be difficult to release that heart string. And, from a metaphysical perspective, it really is a kind of string – an etheric string, a connection from heart to heart, that is vibrationally measurable. That’s why it takes so long to get over a past romance, and why we can’t just pick up and move on. That love string is still attached!
We call this getting our heart broken.
But really it is not knowing how to loosen our heart string from theirs.
Even just knowing this little known esoteric fact will help you if this happens to you. You’ll find yourself recalling it at the perfect moment. And this will help you remember to release your side of the string.
Energetically, that is all that is necessary – to let go of your end.
But out of loyalty, or hope, or guilt, and even sometimes anger, we keep that heart string connected, and we become bound with that person.
Until we let go!
There is an adage that says:
If you love someone, set them free.
If they come back, they’re yours,
and if they don’t, they never were.
Love is a contract, a heart contract. When we declare our love, it is like a promise, and we become loyal to it, and to them – even if it’s not mutual anymore. Sometimes we are clinging to a wish, hoping that they will love us too – when they don’t. Or, that they will somehow fall back in love with us again. Or, that maybe they will change. Or…or…or…
All of these scenarios are just different ways of holding on. Not letting go. Not letting them, or YOU, be free.
So, here are the 3 important spiritual steps to letting go of a relationship:
First and foremost, you must accept. The more you keep hoping that maybe it can work out again, the longer it will take for you to be free. If it’s truly not working, then ultimately it’s not right for either of you. Don’t force or cajole your partner into staying. It will fall apart in the end anyway if it’s not based on a real connection.
Let yourself mourn. This is a quiet and introspective period you need to let yourself have. Don’t rush this process; it will pass soon enough. This is an exceptional time for extraordinary awareness and real change. Practice meditation. Go for walks. Write down your thoughts. Respect this sacred time of letting go.
Start with you. Take that love that you had been offering your partner and give it back to yourself. Re-fall in love with you! Take excellent care of yourself. Make yourself feel beautiful. Do beautiful things. Think beautiful thoughts. Meditate. Clean out the house – your inner house and your outer one! The more love you begin to flow, the more love will start to magnetize all around you.
As you begin to heal, you can re-enter your life with an open heart. You will have come full circle, except that you will have healed, and changed, and grown!
Then, get back into your life. Talk to your friends, visit family. Step by step, start to reengage with life.
The greatest act of love you can give your partner is to truly wish them well.
See them happy. See yourself happy.
Anytime your partner comes to mind, release them while wishing them true happiness like a blessing. Imagine doing this as easily as blowing a dandelion.
And, know that as you do, you will both be blessed.
Diana Lang is a spiritual teacher and author of
OPENING TO MEDITATION – www.DianaLang.com